Friday, January 25, 2008

There's some sense behind all this, I swear.

Screw memes, I think the best way to gain some insight into what someone is like is to record what they do as a part of their daily goings on. And I decided that for blogging purposes, the best way to do this is to record all the search terms you use for one day.

And so...

Things I have entered into google today.

- Russia potato
- Vodka wheat
- Google reader alphabetical order
- jiminycricket
- Melbourne dust storm
- bloomsbury bowling lanes
- Namco southbank
- Network config mac
- Sheep stomach
- Autobots breaks
- Salary calculator

Also for a little further insight into my life:

Random excerpts from The Girl and my googlechat nonsense:

The Girl: careful
Me: Careful of babies!

Me: STACK THE BABIES, STACK THE FUCKING BABIES! QUICKLY!

Some time later....

Me: Maybe if I do this well while I'm here I can chisel myself into it so well that they'll NEED me to keep it running. Which i can definitely do from back home for 400 dollars a month
I will be the WEBMASTER!!!! WEBMASTER!!!!
Whoa, nerd klaxon is going bananas
The Girl: hahaha
yeah, that works
easiest way is to just not give them the account details
so they can't get control of it
mwahaha
Me: eggsackery
The Girl: and threaten to write horrible things on it and send it to their entire database if they dont pay you!
Me: hmm... i like your evil ways
The Girl: YES!
I JUMPED OVER THE HOMELESS!
and kicked them when i did it!
Me: KA-POW!
The Girl: Also, i am now the proud owner of a laminated seating diagram. HUZZAH!
Me: v00t!

And then again, a little later...

The Girl: yes, it makes ACTUAL sense, not crazy jizzle sense
Me: lol
Crazee Jizzle
Lethal Bizzle
Dizzee Rascal
Kevizzle Ruddizzle
The Girl: kevizzle rizzduzzle
Me: lol, sweet
He pwned Johnizzle Howdizzle
The Girl: does the name 'davensac' make you think of something dirty
like, a butterflies testes?
Me: Like a man and his scrote...


Umm. what?
I don't even know what we were talking about. No doubt it was important...

Also I hereby trademark a term.
That term is 'capsident'.

Capsident™ is what you say whenever you accidentally bump the caps lock halfway through the sentence and stART TYPING IN CAPS FOR NO REASON.
If this happens to you, simply write "Sorry, capsident!" and any presumptions that you had begun yelling mid-sentence are waived. It saves you going back, deleting everything and retyping it.
I seriously own this term. I searched for it in google and it exists nowhere else on the internet. So it's mine.
™ Motherfuckers

In other news, my decision earlier this month to make an effort to be more positive has paid off.
At 5pm today, I received an email out of the blue from my boss with the subject 'Salary Review'
Fuck... I presumed bad news.
I read the email...
."..blah blah blah... We're very appreciative of your continued efforts and would like to offer you a 15% payrise, backdated to January 1st 2008."

Fuck yeah. So now I've worked myself into a position where my main repsonisbilities are the upkeep of our new IT systems and the development of our marketing strategy using a new corporate blog I've created.
The boss thinks what i'm doing is revolutionary. It's not. It's called Wordpress. But I'm gonna take all the credit I can get, cos it doesn't come around very often.
My boss also suggested I may want to maintain the blog after I've left England, which would be awesome. Getting paid in pounds while I'm back in Australia would be super awesome.

Will be interesting to see how it all pans out...

Good times... Things seem to be on the up for a change.

5 comments:

Come Back Brighter said...

Ok. Now I have to admit parts of this were like a bad acid trip while trying to read Scary-Go-Round or A Softer World.

Other parts just made me feel jealous. Maybe I will try and make my job seem more cutting edge by inventing a blog for it... Then move to Australia and insist they pay me in pounds. Maybe I could pretend the exchange rate is the reverse of what it is, and so would need to be paid twice as much.

Anonymous said...

So you are going to use Word Press now?

jiminycricket said...

FD: Yeah sometimes when I read back through things, I get a little worried...
Thanks for the Scary Go Round tip off too. I hadn't seen it before. A softer World is awesome though, it cracks me up all the time.
You should definitely move to Australia and get paid in pounds. It's the way of the future. I could maybe write one of those money making books. I could call it "Give up your friends and life, move across the world into a climate that's the opposite of your own and GET RICH QUICK!!"
The foreword would be by Jason Donovan.

Andrew: Yep, after much deliberation I changed my mind and decided to go with wordpress. Seeing as my target audience for the work blog is to be within the design sector, I'm thinking aesthetics are key.
Plus, it'll force me to learn how to use wordpress and I'm all for learning new skills... here's to hoping it works out!

Amanda said...

"The Girl: yes, it makes ACTUAL sense, not crazy jizzle sense
Me: lol
Crazee Jizzle
Lethal Bizzle
Dizzee Rascal
Kevizzle Ruddizzle
The Girl: kevizzle rizzduzzle
Me: lol, sweet
He pwned Johnizzle Howdizzle
The Girl: does the name 'davensac' make you think of something dirty
like, a butterflies testes?
Me: Like a man and his scrote..."


Fuck, that's one of the funniest things I've seen in a long time, and I don't even know why.

Also, " I could call it "Give up your friends and life, move across the world into a climate that's the opposite of your own and GET RICH QUICK!!"
The foreword would be by Jason Donovan."
- also fucking hilarious.

jiminycricket said...

haha... Hi Amanda. Glad you can appreciate our insanity.
And i'm sure Jason Donovan probably would do it... He'll do anything for money these days.