Wednesday, February 27, 2008


Yes, I'll be updating properly again soon... Non Blondie and I are just in the middle of moving house, celebrating birthdays, working etc etc etc so am a bit caught up in all that shit to get a chance to post.

I'd do it from work, but the mad vomit fish/lever arch woman has recently finished an advanced course in 'Pathetic Management- Guidelines For Fat No Hopers With Inferiority Complexes' and is doing her best to look busy in order to cover her stupidity, uselessness and complete incompetence.
God, I hate her and her brainless ass.

So yes, more stories and whatnot to come shortly.

In the meantime, go embrace the real world. Or if you're currently in the north of England repair your shattered home after this morning's horrific earthquake disaster. This will probably require you to do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING considering the earthquake was about as violent and dangerous as a stoned ladybug in a cotton wool jumpsuit.

If the media says one more thing about this 'horrible earthquake' the ghosts of 110,000 Japanese that have died in actual earthquakes are going to come and rape everyone in England with slabs of broken concrete and be all like "You want to feel real earthquake, bitches?"
So stop talking about it.
I don't want concrete in my ass.
Thank you.


Anonymous said...

no real world! Please!

J-Money said...

We once had a tiny earthquake here--its number on the Richter scale was about the same as my GPA--but that didn't stop the local news from acting like our town was on the verge of being sucked into the earth's crust.

Mars said...


the earthquake totally woke me up last night! the walls were a shakin'... i thought my housemate was have a (probably fairly decent) root. so i got up (so they knew i could hear them and presumably cease), went to the WC and then back to sleep.

turns out they weren't having a wall-shaking shag, and it was a freaking earthquake!

Technodoll said...

Your rim is safe, worry not. the japanese sleepeth tightly. :-)

Fever Dog said...

Where is this real world you speak of?

jiminycricket said...

survivingmyself: I know, it sucks. Who do we call to get our Real World reconfigured? Is it our ISP?

j-money: Ha! Local news love to over react when it's readership is in a 'victim' scenario. What? Someone stubbed their toe on a sofa? Healine: ROGUE SOFAS WREAK HAVOC ON LOCAL DIGITS

Mars: That's crazy. Did you make any 'Did I make the earth move for you?' jokes to your flat mate?
I can now say I know someone who has survived an earthquake. You're a battler you are Marsie. You're like a modern day Stuart Diver.

technodoll: haha! I'm going to assume your using the word rim in a tectonic sense... Also, where is it that you get your real-time information on the sleeping patterns of the Japanese. I'm intrigued.

FD: I'm not sure. My doctor tells me it's not the one in my head where I'm an astronaut called Major Tompkins.